Driving to Patience.

I’m one of those people that thinks I’m pretty cool headed behind the wheel and yet I’ve been humbled  a lot lately.

While driving down a one lane street last week, a car came speeding up behind me while honking and flashing it’s lights,  I thought “gee mister, take a chill pill we’re all in a rush”,  I was feeling particularly cranky and although I hate to admit it, I lifted my foot off the gas a little to teach him a lesson.

One block later, I passed the emergency vet clinic and watched in my rear-view mirror as the car zoomed in frantically behind me.  As a huge animal lover; I immediately felt my heart flood with shame, I personally just slowed down that pet getting the help it needed because of my huge assumption.  I realized we just don’t know what another person is going through in life.

Even today as a woman walked across the street slowly I thought “come on, come on, what’s the big hold up?” When I finally got past her I noticed her struggling to juggle her baby and her bag. I wondered; what is happening to me?  I’m nasty and reactive while driving; two words you would not use to describe me out in my world away from the wheel.

Why does this happen to most all of us?  I believe it’s that we forget to think the best of people. When we know and love someone, we give them the benefit of the doubt.  We figure there must be a great reason for their behavior and we don’t usually expect the worst.

When my 92 year old grandma would drive her car, she would pause at every intersection and honk her horn.  As she put it “just a little toot to let them know I’m here”.  My sister and I would double over in laughter.  To this day we fondly remember those driving with grandma moments, yet if one of us was behind an elderly woman we didn’t know doing this, we’d think she was nuts and most likely grumble that it was time for her license to be pulled.

Yesterday I saw a man on a bike flying down the busiest street in my home town.  I thought to myself, “you nut, why don’t you use the sidewalk or better, another street?”  As I passed him I saw that it was a friend of mine and immediately thought “oh, he must be in a hurry, I hope he stays safe on this road”.  Another example of thinking the worst of someone when we don’t know them, but having great patience when we do.

If the one degree of separation between us is true, then I’d say we’re all familiar with one another on some level.  Familiarity breeds patience, and patience leads to peace, not only in this world; but behind the wheel as well.

My best advice?  Fake it till you make it.  Before you label them an ass, consider a few other reasons as to why they’re behaving the way they are.

The next time you find yourself about to react to someone’s driving behavior, imagine someone you love in that car seat you’re about to honk at; and recheck your emotional speed.  Chances are you’ll find a lot more patience in your tank when you remember that if you knew the person; there is most likely a good reason or excuse for what they’re doing and why they’re doing it.

Image courtesy of  Mantas Ruzveltas from freedigitalphotos.net